The Diary
by Everqueen
Summary: Reincarnation fic. ChichiriTasuki. Complete Reborn into Miaka and Taka's time, the seishi gather to hear about a recent trip that Chiri and Tasuki went on and are told an amazing tale.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own Fushigi Yuugi. 

(A/N No anime or internet for a week makes me have some weird dreams. This one came to me in a dream. Hope you like it. Everqueen)

Tasuki threw the door open with a large grin at the gathered group of friends on his doorstep. "Hey, come on in."

The hall and foyer filled with greetings as the rest of the Suzaku warriors and their miko filed past the ex bandit and entered the living room of Chichiri and Tasuki's apartment. They had just settled down on the various couches and chairs when the blue haired magician entered, arms laden with bags and boxes, including one fabric wrapped object under his arm.

"Welcome, minna-chan, no da. We brought presents back for everyone." He smiled and held out gifts to the others as they proclaimed over the presents, all very native of the area in the southwestern part of the united states that they had visited. 

When all the gifts were passed out and opened, dinner was quickly ordered and then Chichiri and Tasuki settled in the final love seat and smiled at each other. Chichiri still held the cloth bound bundle in his arms.

"What do you have there, Chichiri?" Miaka queried. "Is it edible?" The group burst into laughter as Tasuki groaned and dropped his head into his hands and Chichiri got a fake look of surprise and fear on his face. "No, no da. It's not edible. We found something very special while we were in New Mexico and we want to share it with you, no da."

Tasuki was practically bouncing in his seat. Chichiri smiled at his lover and then unwrapped the bundle and pulled out a old looking journal and held it up for the group to see. Chiriko, who was sitting closest to Chichiri (other then Tasuki) saw the inscribed words on the cover and read them out loud. "Journal of John Banklar" He sat back in surprise and a smile bloomed across his face, even as the others looked very confused by the book. "It's the story of you and Tasuki in your past life?"

As Chichiri and Tasuki gave beaming grins and nodded the rest of the group leaned forward eagerly at the thought of what this book contained.

"How did you find it, Chichiri?" Tamahome looked in interest at the well preserved book and then turned inquiring eyes to the two seishi. 

"I hid it, no da. I magically protected it, hid it and then sealed it so only myself or Tasuki could find it, no da. I had hoped that the protection spells would still be up when we went, but we didn't know if they would be, so we kept it a secret that we were really going to get the book, no da." Tasuki was nodding. "Yep, it's the story of how John and Shaun met. Those were our names in our past life." The group settled back in and Miaka clapped her hands. "Oh please, Chichiri, Tasuki, read it to us. We all want to know."

"Yeah, Fang boy, I want to hear about the mountain man, Tasuki. This should be interesting." Tasuki bared his fangs at Nuriko in a good natured gesture and Chichiri chuckled. "Fine. I will read it to you, if you wish. This was written as a journal though and I will skip over the parts that were written before I met Tasuki."

Tasuki smiled a bit "Oh, but read about why you left Boston to begin with, Chichiri. And then give a summarized version of your first few months there." The former monk nodded and opened the book as the group settled back and let the smooth tones of their resident magician settle over them, pulling them into the story of John and Shaun. 

LEAVING BOSTON LEADING UP TO THE CAPTURE OF JOHN!

Leaving on this train has got to be one of the best feelings in the world. I cannot begin to describe the relief I feel to be away from this oppressive city and heading into the wild frontier. Not only to get away from the "flowery Miss. Delphina Whirling" as the Boston rag likes to call her, but from my medling parents and those seeking to help me find happiness when I really just want to be left alone. I am leaving for my first teaching assignment outside of the Boston area and my mother was very unconsolible with my leaving. I do say that she has sequestered herself into her room and has not left for anything but meal times. She did cry most horribly when I went and bid her fairwell. I guess I should be the good little son and just stay where she wants me to, but as my dear friends, Karolyn and Harold, say, I need to live my own life. Only those two alone know what I am looking for, and it is something that "flowery Miss. Delphina Whirling" can not provide me.

(Chichiri looks up from his reading with a smile. "Oh, Karolyn and Harold were the reincarnations of Korin and Hikou. They were married in that life too, no da." He returns to his reading.)

Well, it has now been a week since I have arrived in the New Nexico territory village of Tularosa. I must say, the view out here is absolutely breathtaking. To the east lie spectacular mountains, I am told they are the Sacramento's, that rise majestically from the ground. This quant little town is nestled against them and across the basin, to the west, is another mountain range. Halfway though the basin, which is desert, is startling white sands. I have not been out there, not many people have, considering the dangers of travelling in the desert in late summer, or anytime for that matter, but I must say, sunsets here are truely a sight to behold. As the sun sets over the mountains, the sky routinely turns varying shades of blue, purple, red, orange and yellow. I have never seen a more beautiful sight. 

I am surprised to find myself homesick for Boston though. As pleased as I am to be away from there and truely enchanted by my new surroundings, I still find myself surprised to step from my dwelling or the school house and not be greated by the familiar aroma of the sea. As Mr. Smith down in the general store remarked, "It's all the sand and none of the ocean here, lad." A true statement.

(By this point, Tasuki, and most of the other seishi are leaned back in their chairs, eyes closed, listening to the words of Chichiri. Miaka, however, is leaning forward, methodically eatting an assortment of nuts off the table, taking in Chichiri's every word. Chichiri skips forward a bit and smiles as he finds the entry he is looking for.)

I can not believe I was that foolish. At least I have taken you along, Journal, on this foolishness, so I have some means of writting my foolishness down to you, record it for future people to find. Not that it would do them much good to find this journal, as this is written in some obscure ancient Chinese dialect I seemed to have picked up from somewhere. I even find myself thinking in this language alot. And dream in this language as well, strange dreams, but I digress. I'm drifting off subject. I have been kidnapped. Maybe that is not the correct term, but my mind is too aflutter right now to think more then I already am. It started off innocently enough. It was a lovely day, not too cold, just enough snow. I had remembered a trail I had found earlier right after I moved here and thought it would be nice to watch the sun fade. If I watched it set, I could easily make it back to town by night fall, as long as I didn't dwaddle. Or so I thought. I did not expect to be taken by savages. Yes, I am now a prisoner in an indian tribe. I still can not believe this has happened. I write this down now, in case I do not make it out of here alive. Mayhap this journal, if found, will bring my mother some amount of comfort and peace as she screams to my memorial "I told you so" as she is wont to do. 

However, a small incident has given me rise for hope. As I was lead to whom I believe to be the tribe elder, he suddenly yelped in what I can only assume is surprise, pointed at my knee and began to chatter rapidly to the others in the tribal area. Two warriors were swift to leave, at what I believe were his instructions and I was escorted into this shelter where I await Suzaku knows what fate. This incident might not make sense to any reading this journal, but as long as I can remember, upon my left knee is ancient chinese kanji, the symbol for 'well'. It is not visible to others, I have guessed, as I have never been questioned on it by others that have seen my knee, but I see it plain as day. I also see aura's around people. Mine is very active, more so then others. I once saw a purple haired man (I do not lie) that had a very active aura also. I have always suspected since then that this man might also have a kanji symbol upon his body, but I lost track of him before I could introduce myself and have not seen him since.

I think I am rambling, I can digress that I am rambling now due to my fear of this situation. Karolyn always said it was a bad habit of mine to ramble when uncertain. I think she There is conversation outside and it grows closer. Farewell for now, Journal and everyone else.

BACK IN CHICHIRI AND TASUKI'S APARTMENT-  
Chichiri glances up as the doorbell rings and the group jumps and then lets out a shaky laugh as one. Tasuki jumps up and answers the door and the delicious smell of take out drifts into the living room before the door shuts and he returns with an armful of boxes and cartons. He sets these down in front of Miaka and then returns to the hallway and returns with everyone elses food. Chichiri eats swiftly as Tasuki takes the journal from the monk and starts to read, his food left to wait in favor of continuing the story. 


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Fushigi Yuugi.

Tasuki smiles to the others. "This is where Shaun comes in, so I am going to give a small account from my end of this story, as I remember it, and then continue reading Chichiri's account."

SHAUN'S QUICK HISTORY LESSON, JOHN AND SHAUN MEET, RELEASE AND SETTLING IN.

When I was 8 years old, I was struck by lightening and upon waking up a few days later, not only was I told my heart had stopped beating, but I awoke with complete memories of being Tasuki. I also knew that I had lived other lives since then, but those other lives were unclear. 

When I was 17, I ran away from my overbearing mother, who clung tightly to me after the lightening strike, and went out west, working on the railroad. I eventually came upon what is now known as the Tularosa Basin and settled into the foothills to live a life of seclusion. Yes, Tasuki, the Bandit Warrior of the Suzaku Seishi, living a life of seclusion, but I wanted space and after my memories were returned to me, I always felt as though I didn't belong. I started to think in ancient Chinese dialect and words of it would constantly escape me in my sentences. My parents were threatening me with a mental institute because of it. At this point I just wanted to be left alone.

Then I was captured, just like John was later. I had strayed too far and they took insult to most white folks. I was about to be executed when the village elder came running up, blabbering in their language, which I didn't know at the time. He was pointing at my forearm and gesturing to my body as a whole. I realized this man could see my symbol for some reason. When he realized I also knew it was there, I was escorted back to a shelter and spent the winter with the Apache tribe, learning their language and customs. 

When spring arrived, I knew enough of their language that I was asked by the elder what the symbol meant. After I told him about Suzaku and the fight we all went through, he lead me to the circle and I was... encouraged (fanged grin) to share my story with the others. Reincarnation was sacred to them and upon completion of my tale, I was encouraged to show my granted Suzaku power and was given the name "Fast Lightening". 

A few weeks later, I was released and escorted to my home. There I continued to hunt and fish for my living, returning to Tularosa occassionally for some supplies and trading furs and such that I had no use for with the Apache's for other supplies. 

So, I was in front of my small cabin, chopping wood from a felled tree that landed close to my dwelling when the Apache warriors arrive. I am told that they captured a white man that the elder says has a symbol much like my own and my presence is requested. We left immediately and the elder takes me aside and says there is a man with hair the color of the summer sky, that defy's laws of the earth, with a symbol upon his left knee. Something in my face gives me away, that or my whispering of Chichiri. The elder gives a smile to me. "This could possibly be the Chichiri from your story?" I give a nod, the elder's smile tells me he has figured out my past feelings for the monk of my story.

We enter the shelter that the man is being held in and sure enough, it is a very frightened Chichiri. He looks very startled by my appearance and I crouch before him. "Hello"

He relaxes a bit and clutches his journal a bit closer to his body. "Hello, no da."

Those two words confirm for me that this is Chichiri and I smile. "So, I hear ya got a symbol on yer knee." He gapes at me and then puts his hand over his knee. "They saw it?"

I nod and take my jacket off and roll up my sleeve to show him mine as I reply "Yep, they also saw mine when I was captured a few years ago."

He reaches out a hand to touch my symbol, but pulls back and I smile. "Go ahead, ya can."

He touches it and the shock of Suzaku flows through the both of us. I felt a tingle all the way down to my toes. He stares at me, and his eyes, both this time, scan over my body and I realize he is not looking at my form, but my aura. "Like fire, eh?"

He glances up. "Da?" I grin at him and sit back on my heels. "My aura is like fire and flames, right?"

He gives a confused nod. "Hai, how did you know this, no da?" I grin "A very close friend of mine once described it to me. My name is Shaun, what's yers?"

"John, no da." I give him a smile and stand turning to the elder, who watches us carefully.

"This is Chichiri, no doubt. I can feel his symbol from here and when he touched mine, the presence of our God went through both of us."

The elder nods and gestures for John to be set free. "I will release him to you. If he is a warrior of this God, Suzaku, as you claim, I would not want to upset the bird god by killing one of his warriors. However, a blizzard approaches, he will not be able to make it back to the white man settlement in time."

I nod, having also realized the blizzard was approaching. "I will take him to my dwelling. Apparently he doesn't remember anything from the past or he would have been gone before I even arrived here." I smile over my shoulder to the now freed magician who looks lost and scared. "I will see if I can't convince him to spend time with me and see if I can get his memory restored. I know you would like to hear his version of the story." The elder's love of a good story is well known within the tribe and by myself as well.

We are given passage to leave and I lead him out of the tribe. He is quiet until we get away and then looks at me, fear in his eyes. "Who are you and how did you get me out of there?"

I smile at him. "I'm Shaun Smith. I was born in Savannah, Georgia and moved here about 6 years ago. A few years back I was captured much as you were and spent a winter with the tribe, learning their language and customs. Now I trade freely between Tularosa and the Apache tribe and I trap furs and live alone in the mountains. As for how you got out of there, the Elder noticed your well symbol. Now hush, we need to move quick."

He follows me and I can almost feel his anger. "I thought we were safe though, they let us go." I chuckle and lead him through an obscure path that leads back to my cabin. "We are safe from them, but a blizzard approaches and I'm afraid we are about to get it dumped on us. I will not be taking you back to Tularosa until after it is over." I glance at his shocked face and smile compassionately. He just had a very bad shock today and now he is about to be forced into a cabin and snowed in with a stranger. About 20 minutes later we make it to my cabin and I gesture him inside as I begin to pick up my ax and finish with my wood, knowing I am going to need it. He stands unsure in the doorway and watches me. "Do you wish for me to help you with that?"

I shake my head and keep on chopping, but respond. "No, but could ya go inside and start a fire? I'm almost done with this and will be along shortly."

When I enter the cabin the fire is going and a kettle of coffee is boiling on the stove, giving my cabin a wonderful smell. I dump the arm load I have brought in, the rest stacked neatly outside for easy reach, and strip my outer layers off in the warmth of the cabin. My dwelling is finely built to withstand winters such as this and no drafts drift in.

As I strip to my trousers and shirt, John is pouring out two mugs of coffee and I sit at the rough table with a word of thanks and sip the beverage. The man apparently knows how to make coffee. As I warm up some, I glance to him to find his eyes upon me. "You seem very familiar no da."

I grin "No da?" He blushes some and looks away, stuttering. "Ummmm, it's in an ancient chinese dialect. It means."

"You know" I finish his sentence for him and he stares in shock at me. I take the chance and switch to the language from Konan. "Trust me, I know quite a bit."

He is shocked and then responds in kind. "What is going on here. I feel like I know you, not your form, but your aura."

I grin at him and switch back to English. "That is because we have met before, John. Do you believe in reincarnation?" John gives a nod. "I have always had dreams of being in Ancient China and a reincarnated warrior of a God named Suzaku, but don't remember much more then that."

I grin at him and lean back in my seat, a very Tasuki like move. "Yep, something like that. I also am a Suzaku warrior. I am Tasuki, Celestial Warrior of Suzaku. And we do know each other, I know you." He stares at me and then mutters softly. "I once saw a purple haired man on the street in Boston."

I chuckle and stand. "Very good looking, he could be a woman, right?" I grab a book off the hearth of the fireplace and open it, pulling out a drawing I did in my late teens. I return with it and he takes the picture from me. He puts a finger over Nuriko's face "Yes, this is the one. He is also a Suzaku Warrior?"

I give a nod and take the picture from him, smiling at him. "Yep, that's Nuriko. His symbol is Willow and his Suzaku power was amazing strength." I point to the others and give their names and powers and finally at myself. "This is me, Tasuki. My power is speed, plus my tessen was very useful." A soft whisper of "Rekka Shinen" brings my head up from the picture to smile at him. "Yep, those were the words to activate it."

I hand him the picture and he puts his finger to trace over himself. "Who was I? I don't recall much at all, just a quick flash here and there." I smile slightly at him, my mind racing. Chichiri had been the most powerful of us all and I don't know what good it would do to tell him the past. I decide to give small hints, but I won't give details and see how much he can remember on his own. "Your name was Chichiri. You were a monk of Suzaku and our resident Magician." I watch his face and he looks at me expectantly. "Is that all?"

I nod "All I am going to tell you for now." At his disappointed face, one that always has pulled at my heart, I sigh and lean forward. "Look, John. I have no doubt in my mind that you are Chichiri. You are the second person who has heard that I am Tasuki and not automatically assumed that I am crazy." He stares at me. "You would be the first?"

I shake my head "No, I thought I was crazy too, the first was Rippling Wind, the tribal elder." I sigh softly and try again. "Chichiri was the most powerful amongst us. I'm sure we saw only a fraction of his power and that he knew more secrets then all the others of us combined. Those memories are locked away somewhere within you. I want to help you release them, but I don't think me coming right out and telling you about your past is the best idea. I hope maybe being around a fellow warrior will help you remember. So, lets try that for now, see if just bein' around me will get you to remember something and then go from there, ok?"

He stares at me and then gives a nod. I smile at him and stand, pushing back from the table. "I don't know about ya, but I'm tired. Let's go find you a blanket and you can have the couch. It's plenty comfortable." He nods and puts our dishes in the wash basin and follows me to the bedroom, but stops in the doorway. I grab a thick blanket from the stand in the corner and hand it to him as he turns with it towards the couch. He stops in shock, finally noticing the blue fabric with white bubbles on it. I had found it in a store in Savannah and had bought it instantly, knowing what it was. Ya can't travel through that thing as often as I had with Chichiri and not feel the magic in it. His kesa rests along the back of my couch. I use it for comfort when I am missing him and the others.

He sets his blanket down and picks his kesa up, running his fingers over it. "My kesa."

I chuckle "Yep, found it back in Georgia and knew it was yers. Had to get it." He stares at me. "There is alot of magic in it." I give a nod, hoping he will remember more and he hugs it to him. "Thank you for getting it, Shaun, no da."

"Ah, yer welcome. Now, I must get some sleep. I have alot to get done tomorrow." With this I bid him good night and close the door to my room. It doesn't take me long to get ready for sleep and I lay in bed, listening to him putter around, also preparing for sleep. The sounds are comforting and I sigh, closing my eyes. As sleep claims me, I whisper "I love you, Chichiri."

CHICHIRI AND TASUKI'S APARTMENT-  
Tasuki glances up and pulls out a few papers from the journal that are not attached. "I wrote these down as I remembered them when we were coming back to Japan. Also, here is the picture I drew of us." He passes it around the room and the others proclaim Shaun to be a good artist. Tasuki passes the book to Chichiri with a grin and picks up his food as the monk continues reading from the journal, the others still engrossed in the telling of Shaun and John. 


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own Fushigi Yuugi.

Chichiri smiles and settles back to continue reading out of John's journal. Tasuki sits back beside him, chopsticks in hand as he turns his eyes to watch his lovers face as the monk begins to read.

DURING THE BLIZZARD AND REGAINING MEMORIES AND FEELINGS!

What a strange two days it has been. I am now sitting in a strangers cabin, although I am not sure I can call him that. Let me start from where I left off.

It was voices I heard approaching the shelter I was being held in. I was very surprised when the flap was opened and what can only be described as a mountain man walked in. He had a thick red beard, long red hair and piercing amber eyes. Despite the fear of the situation, I felt comfort from this man immediately. He spoke in English to me for a bit and knew of my symbol and then showed me his. Yes, Journal, that is correct. This man has a symbol. Somehow he got the Apache's to release me and we made it back to his cabin in the foothills before an approaching blizzard stopped us. So, now we are here, in his cabin, a raging blizzard all around. He is skinning animals, that he had caught, in this little leanto at the side of the cabin and I sit here in his living room.

This is where it gets even more strange. He claims he knows me. He also knew the purple haired man from the street in Boston. He showed me this drawing he had, the purple haired man, whom he calls Nuriko, is in it. As am I. He calls me Chichiri in the picture. He also had my kesa as well. I had vague flashes of this item in my dreams, but the moment I saw it, I knew it was mine. I also know what it can do, but I don't know how to access this power.

I think my mother would be very surprised at my behavior of late. Granted, I wasn't given much of a choice to follow this man out of the encampment of the Apache's, but I have a feeling that I might have followed him in a different situation. Like he told me when I met him, his aura reminds me of fire and something about him screams that I know him and he would never harm me. I find myself trusting this stranger with an intensity that rivals the trust I have in Karolyn and Harold. 

Also this morning, I made a very startling discovery. He is handsome. I have never thought of another man in this way and now I am very confused, I don't know what to make of this, or even why I am writting it down. Every cell in my being calls to this man and I am now not able to comfortably relax around him, although it's only been a day, so I don't know why I would be able to relax anyways. But I want to be relaxed around him, I want to be comfortable in his presence. Oh Suzaku, what is happening to me.

(Chichiri flips ahead a bit and smiles in satisfaction.)

Well, the snow finally stopped falling. It's been 3 days of being stuck in this cabin with him. I have done nothing but dream of him at night and think of him during the day. I am no longer thinking of him as Shaun, but in my mind he is Tasuki. I think he has the same problem. He slipped just last night and called me Chichiri when asking for me to set the table while he prepared dinner. My comfort level has risen again with this man, even though I do find him more attractive and distracting as the days go by. For some reason, and I must be reading the situation wrong, he finds me as attractive as I find him. I catch him watching me at odd moments. I always figured that I would be uncomfortable with this type of attention from a man, but now that it is happening, I find this attention very relieving. Something in me seems to want this from Shaun. I wonder if he wants it from me.

More confusing though, are the small memories and recollections that come to me as the days pass. I now have solid memories of the purple haired Nuriko as well as the others from his drawing. Most deal with Tasuki in some manner of fashion. I did mention a few of these partial memories to him and he would describe the scene if he knew what I was remembering. Some of them are from times I was not with Tasuki though. I do find that the more I remember, the more I want my memories, and more importantly, my powers to return.

Now that the snow has stopped, if it remains clear, Tasuki says that we will be able to go down the mountain in a few days. I do hope so. As much as I am enjoying my time with Tasuki and don't want it to stop, I also have a responsibility to those children in Tularosa. Oh, he's back in now. Till later then, no da.

(A few more flips of the book and Chichiri starts to read again.)

Well, no da. I'm back within my own home, here in Tularosa. Tasuki was kind enough to allow me to return with the kesa. I think he realizes that even with my memories not complete, that this is a part of me. One thing does bother me, even after our almost regretful seperation, and my growing feelings (with growing confusion also, no da) I have no memories of Tasuki that would confirm that we were more then friends. Even memories that he says are after we summoned Suzaku, and the ensuing problems that took place afterwards were done, show no sign that he was more to me then a close friend and Suzaku brother. Maybe these feelings were only my own and I never confessed them to him before.

I think I am giving myself a headache with these thoughts. I was greeted with much welcome back into town, as was Tasuki. Apparently he is well respected in town and school is to resume in two days, to give me time to recover from my 'ordeal'. So, now I sit within my home, kesa over my shoulder and draped across my chest. I put it on like this at one point during my stay with Tasuki and he chuckled and said it looked very familiar like that. 

I did send a message to my mother, as she had been informed I was captured by 'savages' and wished to let her and father, as well as Karolyn and Harold, that I was fine. I think I might compose a letter to my dearest friends soon, to inform them of this little adventure and get their opinions on it. They have always believed I was a reincarnation of some person from China, and this confirms it, I must say.

(More flipping of the pages)

Well, school has resumed and although he has almost constantly been on my thoughts and in my mind, I have not seen Tasuki since he left me at my house. I must say, I miss him. Not just because my nights seem so lonely without him to talk to, but it is a deeper yearning in my soul to see him. Maybe this is love. I doubt it, I barely know him. More like infatuation. I got asked to supper by a mother of a young, eligible woman at the church on Sunday. Which makes me point this out. I feel like a hippocrit. I have gone to church all my life and studied the Word, and now here I am, a reincarnation of a warrior for a God named Suzaku. I know Suzaku is real, I have been in his presence, his mark shines from my knee, his gifts of magic and power flow through my veins, unawakened, but there, and here I am, on my knees, at church on Sunday, giving lip service to a God I don't worship. I wonder if Suzaku is displeased with me. I should stop going, but after a few days of being alone, I was very lonely and it was companionship. 

Anyway, back to the mother's invitation. There are not many eligible bachelor's out here and this is not the first time that I have been invited to a families house in an effort to know their eligible child. I have always known that I don't really like women in that way. I never really liked men that way too, school and education seemed more important. I wasn't missing much, I had my friends and an active social life. The women I did escort around Boston were more sisters to me then anything else. But since getting to know Tasuki, I have found myself daydreaming about being with him, not romantically, just living life with him. I know now what I am, I don't feel ashamed either. Tasuki told me that Suzaku is the God of Fire and Love. I seem to recall a memory of me having a conversation with a wrinkled old lady in an elaborate gown, one Tasuki called Taiitsukun, and she told me that Suzaku doesn't look down upon same sex marraiges, that love is a gift no matter what form it takes. He only encourages male and female relationships for procreation. I didn't tell Tasuki about this memory, I am not sure what he would say, although I will admit that I am a bit curious to hear his opinion on it.

(More flipping of pages and the rest of the room is finished eatting, minus Miaka and Tasuki. Everyone is still engrossed in the story.)

I've been back from my 'ordeal' for three weeks now. I am beginning to think that my time spent with Tasuki was a dream, maybe it didn't happen and I was hallucinating. I still have yet to see him and I find myself yearning for him. I wonder now if my previous assessment that this is just infatuation was correct. Shouldn't infatuation dim by now? I yearn for him more and more each day. Maybe it is only that he is my celestial brother. However, my heart's pain says he is more to me then this. I wonder how he is. I wonder where he is. Is he yearning for me as I yearn for him? Does he know that I think I love him? I don't think he could, who knows. I miss him.

I know, I left that off at a weird spot, but as soon as I finished writting that last sentence, a knock sounded at my door and I opened it to find Tasuki standing there, looking very pleased to see me, as much as I was to see him. After I invited him into my house, he wandered around, looking at my items and then picked up my kesa and smiled as he turned to me, holding the fabric. Apparently I'm not the only one that gets comfort out of the old fabric. 

He said he was sorry he hadn't seen me before this, but some of the traps he had up in the mountains were in need of repair and he has not had a chance to return to town until this evening. He gave me a gift, I know not where he found it, but they are my prayer beads that I received as a gift from Taiitsukun. Now is where the experience gets a bit strange. The moment I gripped those beads and rolled them in my fingers, experience and knowledge flooded into me. I remember staggering and the feel of Tasuki holding me up and guiding me towards a chair, but little else for the next few moments.

When the thoughts that had flooded my brain settled, I realized that part of my memory had been unlocked and I knew spells of defense and offense, as well as what I like to call "spells for amusement". I now know a spell that will allow me to deform into a miniture me, one that allows me to be a bit more outgoing. I remember Miaka calling me a chibi while I was in this form. I have not assumed it yet. I have also remembered how to access the dimensional holding area within my kesa and have retrieved my Shakujo and my kasa from there. Tasuki was most impressed and happy by witnessing these powers. I still have not unlocked the spells to use the kesa and kasa for teleportation, but I am sure they will come with time.

However, Journal, one more memory came to mind, one that I was not able to share with Tasuki, for I am unsure if it is real or just a product of my overactive mind. I received a vision when I came around, of me, as Chichiri, in Tasuki's arms, in a very intimate position.

Even now, with Tasuki sleeping upon my couch in the next room, I can not get that image from my head. He still has not shown to me that he feels for me in any way other then friendship and brotherhood. I find myself floundering with how to treat these growing feelings within me. I wish Tasuki would give me some clue.

(A/N The part where Chichiri got the rush of information from the prayer beads was not my idea, I just loved it. This was from Babbling Brook's story "New Life, Old Bonds" which I consider to be one of the greatest Chichiri/Tasuki fanfictions out there. I definately recommend everyone to read it.) 


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own Fushigi Yuugi

As Chichiri flipped forward to the next entry that pertains to what he is reading, Tasuki finishes eating and leans back as Nuriko smiles. "So, Chichiri, what memory did you regain that was of you and Tasuki in an intimate setting?"

The blue haired magician blushes a deep red and Tasuki smirks at this, crossing his arms over his chest. "Yeah, Chiri, ya never told me what that image was." Keeping his place in the journal with a finger, Chichiri leans over and whispers something in his lover's ear. Tasuki's mouth falls open and he looks shocked. When the monk is done, the bandit sits back and looks to him. "Ya remembered that one?" Chichiri blushes more and nods, causing Tasuki to chuckle, the others looking confused and a bit curious. "How did ya manage to not jump me after ya remembered that, Chichiri?"

"TASUKI, NO DA!" The redhead just chuckles at his lover's obvious discomfort and leans back. "We'll discuss it later, go ahead and continue readin'." Nuriko opens his mouth to ask again, but Hotohori puts a hand over it and shakes his head to his lover. "Let it be." The purple haired warrior just nods in consent to his love's command. Chichiri sighs in relief and opens the book again, starting to read.

RESCUE AND RETURNING!

It has been a very long few days, no da. So much has happened and I doubt I will be the same ever again. I now know who I am, I have my memories back and my powers restored. I have Tasuki-chan to thank for this. It all started a few days ago.

I had been reading in my room, or trying to. It was snowing in the mountains again, although just drizzling rain down here in the basin and my mind was on Tasuki and how he was fairing. It has been a couple weeks since I had seen him, although he is suppose to return the next day for supplies and I had offered him the use of my couch. I knew by that point that I was in love with him. With the memories that were coming back to me in a steady pace, there was no way that he and I could not have been lovers in our past lives, and hopefully would be in this one also. So, there I was, trying to read, when I felt it. Something that was completely alien in this life, but a feeling that I knew right off. Tasuki was in trouble. 

I think I spent the next few minutes running around in a panic, trying to find what I would need, as the feeling grew in intensity. The more it grew, the worse my panic. I was about to head out the door when I caught sight of my kesa and kasa. In a moment of clarity, I knew how to use the items again. I tossed the kesa over my shoulders, grabbed my shakujou and muttered the spell and dropped the kasa over my body, disappearing into it. I emerged in the forest in the mountains, amid swirling white snow. I could see Tasuki's cabin barely to the right of me but did not feel his ki anywhere. I closed my eyes and searched for it and discovered it, weak, off to the left. It took a minute or two of trudging through the snow to find him, but he was half frozen when I found him. 

Somehow I managed to roll his sturdier body onto the kesa and using the shakujou, I was able to tap into the kesa's powers and I transported us into his cabin. The fire was out and our landing was a bit rough, just like I remembered. I quickly covered him and then lit the fire, trying to warm the main room up.

I turned back to him and finally got a good look at him. He was so frozen, his lips were blue. I could see his chest rising slowly, but his breathing was shallow and not very strong. I shed him of his clothes and pulled him to the fur rug on the floor before the fire, to warm him. After covering him with blankets, I made sure the fire was lit, pulled more wood in and then settled close to him to watch over him. After 20 minutes of watching him shiver and his lips still being tinged blue, I finally approached him and pulled him to me. 

We spent the night this way, me cuddling him to my chest and he slowly warming up. At one point I fell asleep and when I awoke, the fire was low in the hearth and I felt eyes upon me. I turned my head to find him blinking sleepily up at me. I remember the conversation going something like this.

"Chichiri?"

"Hai, it's me, Tasuki."

He sighed and laid his head back on my shirt covered chest and cuddled closer with a small shiver. "Are you cold, Tas-chan?"

He shook his head "Not bad, just tired. What happened?"

"I found you nearly frozen to death outside, no da."

"Ah, I got caught in the storm while checking my traps and was trying to make it home. How close did I get?"

"Pretty close, within seeing distance on a clear day." He sighed and cuddled more.

"How did ya know?"

"I felt it. I knew I had to get to you. I couldn't lose you."

I felt him smile at this point and he nuzzled into my chest. "My last thoughts before I lost consciencness were that I didn't want to leave ya, Chichiri."

I smile and hold him closer, trying to not think of how close I had been to losing him. I felt him stir and his voice was soft and sleepy again. "How did ya get up here?"

"I used the kasa to get here, located your fading ki, got you onto the kesa and teleported us into your cabin, no da."

He was now looking at me, head raised, startled. "Ya remembered how to teleport?"

I gave a nod then and smiled. "Yep, just in time, no da."

He smiled and cuddled back down. "How much do ya remember now?" I was silent for a minute as I realized that in the panic and stress of finding and rescuing Tasuki, my memories were completely restored. I remembered everything, all of my past, including memories from other lives. 

I looked up into his face and I smiled at the hopeful look in his eyes. "I remember everything."

He smiled slightly, fangs poking out over the beard. "Everything?"

I gave a nod. "Yes, koi. Everything."

His slight smile grew into a full blown grin at this point "About fuckin' time. I've been wanting ya to remember everything since I first saw ya at the Apache encampment."

I chuckled and our lips met together in a kiss for the first time in this lifetime and I pulled him closer as he cuddled down against me again. I lovingly ran my fingers through his hair and smiled then. "I have remembered about us for a few weeks, actually, since you gave me the prayer beads. I just thought that they were products of my imagination as I have been attracted to you since the first full day I was here."

He had looked back up to me at this point and had pouted cutely. "The first full day? Ya didn't want my sexy bod the first day?" I chuckled and kissed his lips again. "I was too scared to notice your sexy bod that first day, Tasuki, no da." He smiled and held me, not saying anything.

We woke up again much later. Well, I woke up to the feel of his lips on my skin. Apparently he had thought I needed my shirt off and he was running his lips and tongue along my skin. What happened after that, Journal, is not something to be written here. Let me just say, I wish he had grown a beard before, it was a unique experience.

(Chichiri's face is bright red as he is reading this, although Tasuki is rubbing his chin and looks thoughtful.)

The next day was spent just being together. We talk about things from our past, wonder how the others are doing, and just get to know each other again. I eventually used my kasa to return to my home and he arrived later that day to get his supplies and we spent much of the evening talking before we retired to bed. 

It wasn't until he had returned to his cabin, after we discussed how often I would visit him, via use of my kasa, that I thought about my job. It will be more difficult here, in this land and time, to have a relationship with my koi, then it was in Konan. The God of this land is not as understanding as Suzaku about these things and this has led towards a fear of our type of love. For now, I will teach and he will trap and we will just have to sneak around to see each other, unless he comes to town. All I know is, dear Journal, something worth having is never easy. And he is definately worth the effort.

BACK IN CHICHIRI AND TASUKI'S APARTMENT!

Chichiri shut the book with a smile. "That is basically how John and Shaun got together in our past life."

Tasuki chuckled and sat back in his chair. "That was a good life."

Miaka smiled and the others let out breathy sighs. "So, did the people there ever figure it out, or were you made to sneak around forever?"

Chichiri and Tasuki smiled at Miaka's question. "Well, we ended up not having to sneak. People accepted our friendship due to my rescue of Chichiri from the Apache Nation. Later, that coming summer, there was a storm that started a fire near my cabin and I lost my dwelling. Of course, Chichiri immediately let me live with him and the people of Tularosa never thought anything of it. A second bedroom was added to the dwelling for me, although it became a spare room, and in the privacy of our home, we were able to live as we pleased and we were just careful and respectful to others and their opinions if we ventured out."

Chichiri gives a nod to his lover's words. "Hai, I'm sure that people suspected that Tasuki and I were more then best friends and housemates, but we were very cautious about it and in truth, the only people who knew the truth, besides us, were Harold and Karolyn, and some others." Chichiri winks at Nuriko, a move Miaka misses and Tasuki shook his head "Uh uh, remember, the Apache tribal elder knew as well. Whenever we would visit them, we were given one shelter to share. That is not custom, we were both grown men and should have each received our own smaller shelter, but we were given a larger one to share." Tasuki grinned at the astonishment on his lover's face. 

The blue haired monk spoke softly. "I never knew that." Tasuki grinned. "Ya only learned the language, Chichiri, but I learned their customs. That fact was never lost on me." Chichiri chuckled softly. "That does explain somethings, no da."

Miaka chuckled softly and stretched. "That was a great story, guys. I always love hearing about your different lives since we met in the book." Miaka's eyes turn to Nuriko and she smiles. "I wonder if that was you he saw on the streets of Boston though."

Nuriko begins to chuckle. "Oh yes, that was definately me. The story doesn't end there. Chichiri was one of the last of us in that lifetime to remember his past."

The group smiles and Miaka settles back, feeling another story is starting. "I had seen Chichiri in the street and most of my memories were returned at that point. I had been a bit cautious of calling out to him, not knowing his name then, so I went into the store that I was standing in front of and got Hotohori to come outside, but by this point Chichiri was gone.

Hotohori nods "We had continued to wonder about him for awhile and did some searching, both physically that day and later on, inquiring. His hair is very unique. We found out who he was not long after he left for Tularosa. We wanted to contact him, but didn't know how."

Chichiri and Tasuki, having heard this before, although a lifetime ago, smile and settle back into the seat they occupy, content to listen. Miaka and Tamahome, the only two not knowing this story, are listening intensly. 

Nuriko continues "About a year after Chichiri went to New Mexico, Hotohori and I met Harold and Karolyn at a party. We were always very careful about exposing people to our lifestyle and went to party's as friends only. Those two saw right through that and at one point Karolyn and I were on the balcony, alone, getting some fresh air when she asked me how long Hotohori and I had been together. I was very surprised by her acceptance, and Harold's. A few gatherings later, we were having a quiet gathering of the four of us at their house when they revealed that their closest friend was in love with a man out in New Mexico. It was arranged after that to have Hotohori and myself write to John and Shaun, to become penpals."

Chichiri and Tasuki start to chuckle. "I remember Nuriko's first letter to us, no da. I was shocked with Karo and Harry's complete acceptance of our situation to the point they found us another gay couple to communicate with, as we did want interaction with other male and male couples. It took some time for it to grow, but after awhile we began to suspect that Ryan and Seth was really Hotohori and Nuriko."

The regal couple smiles and the others chuckle at this. Miaka leans forward "How did you know?"

"At one point, Seth called Ryan "My lovely Willow" and at another Ryan called Seth "My beautiful sea serpent." Miaka bursts into laughter at Tasuki's words.

Nuriko smiles "By then, thanks to Harold and Karolyn's descriptions of the two of you, we thought you were Tasuki and Chichiri." The couple nods.

"Yep. Not long after we got that letter, Tasuki and I took a vacation to Boston for the birth of Harold and Karolyn's first child, as I was to be the godfather, no da. We arranged a meeting with Ryan and Seth during the time we were visiting." The group is smiling now.

Miaka looks around. "What happened?"

Hotohori chuckles. "Ryan got a glimpse of Chichiri and Tasuki before the meeting and realized our suspisions were correct, so instead of it being a meeting between the four of us, Mitsukake and Chiriko were there also."

Tamahome and Miaka turn to these two seishi. "You were there also?" Both nod and grin. "I was a doctor for Nuriko and Hotohori. I knew from the start who they were and of course they only trusted me. About a year after they started coming to me, Chiriko came in. He was about 7 years older then the rest of us and had a young family." Chiriko, now once again the youngest, smiles at the memory.

"I very much enjoyed being the oldest that time around, but being the youngest has it's benefits too. My oldest child was 6 and he had broken his leg. We had just moved into that part of Boston due to my job as a lawyer and Mitsukake's office was the first I had come across. I also had my memories and knew right off who he was."

Nuriko gives a nod. "So, we set up a private dinner at our house and invited everyone over. Chiriko and Mitsukake were already at our house when Chichiri and Tasuki arrived. Let me tell you, the first few moments were tense as we beat around the bush, not knowing if Chichiri and Tasuki knew, and them not knowing if the rest of us knew."

Hotohori chuckled at the memory, as did the others. "Till Nuriko got a brilliant idea. He asked me for the time in Chinese. Chiriko, Mitsukake, Chichiri and myself all responded in kind, at the same time. That broke the ice."

Miaka smiled at them, pleased to hear that they had all reunited before this life. "I am so pleased that you all knew each other in past lives, that gives me hope that this won't be the only life that Taka and I are together." 

Chichiri smiled and drew Tasuki closer to his side. "It's all a gift from Suzaku, no da. We lucked out being the Celestial Warriors of the God of Love, no da." The group picked up plastic cups from the table and an impromptu toast was given at these words.

THE END!

(A/N Ok, I think the ending sucks, but I'm not sure how else to end it. I hope you liked it. I had the ending a bit differently at first, but after a few days of thinking on it, I rewrote it to this and like it much better. I hope you all enjoyed it. And see what happens when i move? You guys get stories. LOL Everqueen) 


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